Last updateMon, 07 Jul 2014 9am

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Wife in anger: I was mad when i accepted your marriage proposal shortly..

Hubby: Yes honey, but I was in love so i could not cared for that..

Sherie: What do you do if your wife throws a pin at you?

Scot: I will run as fast as possible..

Sherie: Why so?

Scot: Because it is possible that he may still holding a grenade in her hand!!

THERE was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away.”

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison.”

I'M tired of this Dettol adverts, children now believe there are Germs everywhere.. My 3yr old nephew goes around with a Dettol pet can in his pocket. He sprinkles his friends before playing with them, even his books before reading...this morning my rice tasted awful, took a few spoons before I realized my nephew had poured Dettol in my food 2 kill germs! If my Nephew doesn't kill me, who will?

THREE contractors were visiting a tourist attraction on the same day. One was from Nigeria, another from Germany, and the third from France.

At the end of the tour, the guard asked them what they did for a living.

When they all replied that they were contractors, the guard said, "Hey we need one of the rear fences redone. Why don't you guys take a look at it & give me a bid?" So, to the back fence they all went to check it out.

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